About six years ago I made a decision: She is going to be the one I'll marry ! Not an easy decision for a 24 going on 25 years old guy like me to make.
I took a quick glance at my friends and the average wedding age of my generation, and I realized how unconventional my decision was. Most of today's "almost 25" guys find it difficult to decide what side dish to have with their burger, what to study and even if they should get out of bed at all.
Thoughts of guest plans, selecting a DJ and the color of the invitations seem to them as if they belong in an American chick flick! One which they would probably criticize in the ears of their friends but secretly enjoy.
On the other hand I have to admit that the circumstances were extenuating, so I can assume that anyone else would have done the same. That same year my future wife and I entered our seventh year together. Our relationship began in our high school years, survived the army service, moving in together, adopting a dog and many more special moments that filled our life with special colors. What could I do? I couldn't imagine life without her. Not moving forward was almost like telling the doctor: "Ok, you can cut that hand off".
I asked myself, am I mentally capable of deciding which dishes I want to be served in that special evening? What would be the color of my suit be and which wedding ring should I buy? My masochistic revelation from that same morning indicated that I was not only ready, but also enthusiastic and fascinated by the whole preparations thing. I checked if I got my period yet… Seems not!
With a kitschy love song playing in my head I imagining her face when she would see the ring, I realized that now would be a good time to find a ring. As we were still students at the time I needed something outstanding but with a good price. I decided to look for a ring in the budget of $2000. I looked all over and when I thought I'd have to settle for a ring made out of gummy bears, I found this Tacori engagement ring:
It was exactly what I had in mind and I was finally ready to make the move. Now I just needed to find the perfect moment!
My future wife could smell the scent of the decision miles away, It's hard for us men to hide it. When she found out about my revelation, she started searching everywhere in the house, a search that wouldn't shame even rabbi Ovadia's Passover cleaning. She looked in all the corners of the house, places that even mice haven't gotten to yet. As a well-trained partisan, I managed to avoid exposing the precious ring by keeping it on me the whole time! Some of you might think it was an act of a genius… It was not!
The reason for that is because every moment becomes a potential moment to propose. A party with friends, a family dinner, a romantic observation… But nothing seemed perfect enough!
After a routine night in a club we came back to our apartment and she seemed to be troubled. "Everything is the same… There's nothing new or surprising!" At that moment, the light bulb hanging over my head lit up. I took her hand and led her to the roof. It wasn't decorated, no choir girls singing in harmony and no doves flying above our heads. I took a moment to look down at the view of Haifa, and knew that even if without choir girls, we were perfect for each other and that's what made the moment perfect.
"I'm sure I can still surprise you" I said, and pulled the ring out. We stayed in each other's arms until our heart beats relaxed a little, and went back to the apartment. "But where did you hide it all this time?" She asked me. Lady, these kinds of secrets a partisan can never tell.
צילום: visualphotos.com
After six years of marriage and a last terrible anniversary and valentine's day, which included me being sick, an early invitation to her family, not being together on these days and missing a text message from her, (stupid me) I realized something. Looking at our lives we are the same couple we were six and a half years ago on that roof. The moments are not always perfect but we will always be perfect for each other, we don't need choirs and doves to express our love, we just need each other.